6月大学英语六级作文写作三大原则(2)

2013年06月13日17:02  新东方 微博   
  六级写作改卷分析

  应对改卷的五大策略

  1、字迹清楚,段落明朗

  2、内容完整,紧扣提纲

  3、首句正确,再求闪光

  4、先总后分,连词用上

  5、语言简练,内容得当

  具体改卷示例

  实例一

  2003年1月真题

  ④Now in our society, many people are not honest in doing soming. We ofte can meet with soming happened cause by people who are not honest. For example Now we take the bus need carry cents own, and when you upstairs the bus, you should put the cent into the money box. Every people do that, but some of the people put the other things instead the cents. For another example, it is more normal that in the exams we can always find some students see others。

  I consider that every people should be honest. As a people, honest should be first, because it can make us to be increase and make our socity develop. In doing every thing we should be honest all, study, word, life and so on. If you are honest, every people will be friend to you, and who will regard you are good people。

  But if you don’t be honest, people must unwilling to trath with you. So if you are want to be a good people, remember honest first。

  ⑤Nowadays, many people choose not to be honest in our modern society. We almost can find such things every day of our life: some students cheat in the exam for higher marks; some corporations tell wrong data to the public in order to get more investment; and some doctors treat their patients with unnecessary and expensive medicines in order to make money, sometimes damaged the patients’ health, even their life。

  Seeing this situation. I think it must be changed. Being honest will benefit not only others, but also ourselves. First, your honesty will make others willing to trust you. Second, being honest can lead you to face your problem bravely, which helps to solve it. And the last, honest surely helps to make the society more harmony。

  So. I think everyone should start to be honest and everyone should have the idea that our society can not do without honesty。

  实例二

  1999年6月真题

  Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic Reading Selectively or Extensively? You should write at least 120 words and you should base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below:

  1. 有些人认为读书要有选择

  2. 有些人认为应当博览群书

  3. 我的看法

  ①When it comes to reading, some people think that reading selectively is a good way, but some other people do not agree with them, they think that reading extensively is better。

  Those people, who think that reading selectively is better, believe that good books are as many as bad books. Those good books can give us pleasure and knowledge, while those bad books can only lead us to the wrong way. So, they suggest that we should only choose the good books to read and never touch the bad books。

  But, the other people, who hold that reading extensively is better, think that one kind of books can only give us one aspect of knowledge. Even the bes book only contains one field of information. So, they can easily come to the conclusion that “to know more, to read more”. So they believe that reading extensively is better。

  To my point, we should choose good books to read and read good books as many as possible. By this way, we can increase the quality and quantity of reading。(11分)

  注:when it comes to 当谈到……的时候

  When it comes to reading, opinions differ from person to person。

  Those people who think that reading selectively is better believe that good books are as many as bad books。

  可以表示“认为”:argue, claim, assert, hold, maintain. 但这些词一般跟在

  第三人称后面。

  But 改为 However

  the 去掉

  to my point 改成 in my opinion / in my view / As far as I am concerned

  ②I think reading not only selectively but also extensively. Because the two sides are not contradict. Our time is limited. So we can not read every book in the world. However, we will not be interested in every book. We should read those books may be useful to ours, read those books which we like. But those books which we choose must be extensively so it can give ours all kinds of knowledge, news and so on, it also make ours become a wise man. On the one han reading selectively let ours not waste our time which it is limitted. Moreove it can emphasis among all books that we can read. On the other hand reading extensively can deal with all kinds of need in our life. They are all useful to ours。(5分)

  ③Most people thought that read books should have been selectived. But others belived reading extentively was correction。

  Selective books or reading extensively?

  Sure, you can choice one from previous ideas,

  on one hand, There are too book to read for us. We should choose those which we intrested, and it

  would be helpful for us。

  on another hand. Someone’s intresting was wide. Each book could bring yo specific contain we couldn’t reading at only one level。

  I confirmed all of these ideas were good but weren’t wise。

  As a reader, the main task is to discover more and more books the second task is to held some which wonderful and helpful for us. Don’t treat these books with rackless abandon。

  The best technology of reading is connect。(2分)

  ④How should we read? Should we read selectively or extensively? Everyone has his own view。

  Some people think we should read selectively. They argue that with the development of modern science and technology, more and more books are published. It is impossible for us to read all the books. What’s more, there are many bad books that are poisonous to our mind, and we shouldn’t read them. Since we can’t read all the books and we shouldn’t read bad books, we must read selectively。

  But others may not agree. They emphasize that today’s society is not wha it was. If one man has many kinds of knowledge he’ll have more chances to succeed. If a man knows much in one field but knows nothing in other fields, he may be useless. Since we must have many kinds of knowledge, we must read extensively。

  Who’s right? I think both of them have something right. But I think we should read extensively first. We should read books in many fields, and read selectively in one field。(14分)

  注:more and more 可改为 an increasing number of

  ⑤ Some people think reading shall be choosed. Because some books are goo to hummen beings and some books are harmful to people。

  Some people think that men shoud read books widely. Because wide reading can help man get much knowledge. And man can use it to change the world。

  It is my point that reading must be selectively. Because reading is important to man. Some books can help man but some books can lead some people to crime. It can be seen in the newspapers and watched on TV. We can make full use of some good books and gain more useful knowledge. It can make our life more beauiful. We must give up those unhelpful books. They are not good to us. Reading them is wasting time and money. So reading selectively is an important part in reading。(8分)

  实例三

  2003年1月真题

  Directions: For this part, you are allowed thirty minutes to write a composition on the topic It Pays to Be Honest. You should write at least 150 words and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below:

  1. 当今社会上存在着很多不诚实的现象。

  2. 诚实利人利己,做人应该诚实。

  It Pays to Be Honest

  ①In our modern social life, there are many examples around us show many people are cheated. Advertisements cheat people, salesmen cheat people, even one’s closest friends cheat him or her. So many heartbreaks are heard everyday that we cannot help asking: where is our honest exist?

  Everybody is taught honest in the primary school or even in the kindergarten. Honesty does good not only to ourselves, but to others as well. If we are honest to others. We will be happier and be in a better mood. Otherwise, we’ll feel guilt at last. To a company and its advertisement, honesty will bring it more consumer and more profit. If we cheat others, friends will never believe you and they will leave you alone. To a company, no consumer will buy your product again。

  So, as the above is said, it pays to be honest. Let’s create a morally outstanding social。

  注:show改为showing或 在show前加 that

  honest 前应加上to be

  as the above is said 正确语序为 as is said above

  ②Although honesty is believed to be a virtue, there are still dishonest people in our society. For example, some businessmen sell fake product to thei consumers; some students cheat in the exams。

  Dishonest people are short-sighted. Those who sell fake products may make money at first, but consumers won’t buy their products any more. As a result they will lose their fortune or even be sent to prison. By contrast, honest people gain a lot. Those who always tell truth or keep to their promise not onl let others trust them but gain respect from other people as well. Such person are sure to have a lot of good friends. Because they are trustable and respectable, everyone is eager to make friends with them. Besides, it is easier for a person with a good record to get a good job. Generally speaking, every employer wants his employees to be honest. So we can say that anyone who is honest will be paid back later。

  In a word, honesty wins trust, respect and honor. So it is important that we should be honest。

  注:product应改为复数形式

  ③With the development of modern economic and industry, competitive is becoming more and more obvious. At the same time, the performance of dishonest is becoming more and more clearly。

  Nowadays, there are many dishonest performance in our society. For example, some people found that he saled goods had past the preservation date. Not throw them away, they revised the perservation date, and saled them again after several days. Another case in the point, a pair of shoes was made from goat. However, in order to sale at a high price, the salers would say they were made from cow which has good quality。

  From the foregoing, we can see that dishonest dose not only harm to yourselves but also harm to others. And it is no use only realise the harmness of dishonest. We should be honest from now on and be honest in our daily life. It is only that people all over the world are honest them our country will be beautiful and wealthy。

  注:economic 改为 economy

  industry 改为 society

  competitive 改为 competition

  obvious 改为 fierce (激烈的)

  more and more 最好改为 increasingly

  phenomenon/phenomena 现象

  behavior/action 行为

  fur 皮毛 skin 皮肤

  leather 皮革

  hide 兽皮

  from 改为 of

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