By Trevor Metz

　　Why do foreigners like Chinese women? We just do. You have read all that before but I am going to try to illustrate why Chinese girls like western guys. I am sure the following column is going to offend some people but I don’t mean it as a slap in the face. I am writing it purely to provide some insight. I am using my girlfriend as my Guinea Pig. If you don’t know what that means, it’s not as offensive as it sounds. It means I am going to use her as my subject for the column.

　　To give you some background on my girl, Jing Jing, she has dated foreign guys before. I am not the first foreign man she has had a long relationship with. She has also been married before to a Chinese man so she has a balanced frame of reference. I am not saying she is the ultimate authority but she can put the two cultures in perspective.

　　I first asked her, what attracted her to foreign men? She said, “Western guys are easy to read. I know if they are good or bad guys after one date.” She also said, “I like the attention I get from being with a handsome western man. I think western men are stronger looking than Chinese men. I like that they are taller and more handsome.”

　　When it comes to western attitudes Jing Jing says, “Western men are more polite to Chinese girls. They pay more attention to the details of their appearance and life. They are cleaner and they are more interesting. They know more about the world than Chinese men do. I just feel they are smarter.”

　　I told you this column would offend some of you.

　　I then asked her, what are the bad things about dating a foreigner? She said, “While I like the way some people look at you, I don’t like the way others look at you. They ask, “Why is such a pretty Chinese girl is dating a foreigner?” They talk behind you and say unpleasant things.”

　　She says it isn’t all peaches and cream dating a foreigner. Jing Jing says there are huge cultural differences. She says little things matter to her that western men don’t take seriously. “For instance, westerners are very selfish. It seems they just think about themselves and not care about others. Like when they are eating. They never ask the girl if she wants to eat first. They just grab what they want and eat it. Chinese people like to take others in consideration first. That’s just one of the many differences.”

　　I was playing with fire here when I asked her, what it was about me that she disliked or liked? I knew I was not going to like the answers I got back but I had to ask anyway. She said “You are the person I really like so I want to do things for you. I like that you are honest. I think you are kind with a good heart and you treat me very well. I like your personality. But I don’t like when you go out too often with your friends. You go to bars and drink beers and play darts. You all ignore your girlfriends. It makes me crazy when you do these things!”

　　I finally asked her what she would change about me if she could. She said, “I don’t want to change you. Then you would be someone else. I like you. I just want you to be good. I don’t want you smoking and drinking beers. I want you to be healthy.” I had to chuckle about this. I like having beers and playing darts. I have cut back on my vices but I can’t seem to give up altogether. I don’t think I could keep my sanity in Beijing if I did. I hate to break this to you ladies, but men need an outlet. A few dart, beers, and smokes in moderation are not that bad.

　　Personally I really like dating a Chinese girl. I find her very honest and caring. She makes me take this awful medicine when I am sick. She makes me eat my vegetables. I love the way she cuddles up next to me in bed. I like the way she breaks out into hysterics every time I take off my shirt. She calls me “Da Xing Xing”! Or monster! Or Peng Wawa, which I think means fat baby. I know not every girl prefers western guys and not every western guy prefers Chinese girls, but I think for the most part it’s a good fit. We seem to understand each other’s needs.

　　Now, to finally offend those who have not been offended yet, here we go. I asked her about sex about two months before I did this interview but remember clearly what she said. She mused that western men are much better in bed. She found we take our time with sex and concentrate more on the women’s pleasure. She said she found western men were a little larger in the pleasure regions as well. I had to laugh about this. I am not sure if this is something that Chinese girls tell their western boyfriends to make them feel good or not, but she seems pretty sincere. She said that her ex-husband just took care of business and rolled over. She said she knew there was more to sex and she felt frustrated by her sex life. Again, guys, I am not saying western men are bigger and better at sex; I am just retelling my girlfriend’s experiences.

　　So there you have it. Perhaps there is some insight in there somewhere. I can’t come to any conclusions from this because they are not my opinions. I hope this isn’t offensive, although I can imagine it won’t make many men are going to be happy. But then again, maybe it’s time for a change in attitudes as more and more foreigners come to China.