While most people choose mates who are like them in many ways, new research exposes a big and important exception: When it comes to spending habits, we tend to marry our opposites。

　　大多数人都会选择在很多方面跟自己相似的伴侣，但新的研究却显示出一个重要例外：我们往往会选择跟自己花钱习惯完全相反的人结婚。

　　Spendthrifts tend to marry tightwads, and tightwads tend to marry spendthrifts, says this New York Times feature based on researchers' examination of several surveys and a randomized poll on the topic. While the reasons aren't clear, it could be that one partner sees in the other something he or she needs. If you're a spendthrift picking a mate, you might unconsciously be looking for help reining in bad spending habits. If you're a tightwad, you might feel a need to loosen up and have a little fun。

　　《纽约时报》(New York Times)的一篇文章根据研究人员的多项调查及有关这个主题的随机调查称，花钱大手大脚的人通常会和精打细算的人结婚，反之亦然。虽然原因尚不清楚，但这可能是因为一方看到了他或她另外一方面的需要。如果你花钱大手大脚，在选择伴侣时可能就不由自主地渴望控制不良支出习惯。如果你花钱精打细算，可能也觉得需要放松一下，增添点乐趣。

　　Researchers at the University of Pennsylvania, the University of Michigan and Northwestern University studied several on-line surveys asking couples to assess their personal feelings toward spending money, and also commissioned a randomized poll on the topic. Respondents were rated on a 'Tightwad-Spendthrift scale' based on how each partner felt about spending money。

　　宾夕法尼亚大学、密歇根大学和西北大学的研究人员分析了要求夫妻对他们支出习惯进行个人评价的多项网上调查，也就这一话题进行了随机调查。根据受访者对自己支出习惯的感觉，对他们在“节俭-挥霍刻度表”上进行打分。

　　The pattern they uncovered, of people matching up with their financial opposites, could be one reason money is the source of so much tension in so many marriages. Clearly, too many people fail to discuss money issues before they get married, the article says. In a recent book, 'Financially Ever After,' my colleague Jeff Opdyke discusses some of the underlying emotional issues, and outlines 10 questions every couple should discuss before tying the knot, including 'how do you use debt?' and 'will we operate from one checkbook … or three?' The fact that more couples have separate checking accounts, compared with the past, as I've written in my 'Work & Family' Column, can make it easier for couples to avoid resolving their financial differences, by keeping at least some of their financial affairs separate。

　　他们发现的这种在理财上寻找截然不同者结婚的模式可能是导致如此多婚姻关系紧张的根源。这篇文章说，显然，大多数人在结婚前都没有讨论钱的问题。我的同事奥德克(Jeff Opdyke)在不久前出版的一本名为《财务无忧的婚姻》(Financially Ever After)的书中谈到了一些潜在的情感问题，并概括了每对恋人在婚前都应该讨论的10个问题，包括“你是如何利用负债的？”和“我们是用一个支票本，或者三个？”正如我在“工作•家”专栏中写过的，与过去相比，越来越多的夫妻都有自己单独的支票本了，这有助于夫妻双方避免面对理财上的分歧，因为它至少分开了一些财务问题。

　　The pattern described in the Times' story has held true in my own family. As teenagers, my sister and I had opposite spending habits. She loved to shop and buy clothes, while I tended to pinch pennies. True to the research, we each married men who were our opposites in money management; her husband was frugal while mine liked to spend. Since then, we have each changed in opposite directions. Now, my sister is a master at saving; at our recent family reunion, she hosted two separate meals, a picnic and cookout, for more than 40 people for a total cost of less than $250, by shopping at Wal-Mart and using her well-practiced eye for bargains. When my turn came to organize a meal, I spent about twice as much。

　　《纽约时报》文章所描述的模式在我自己的家庭中就切实存在。还在十几岁时，我的妹妹和我的消费习惯就截然不同。她喜欢购物和买衣服，而我向来吝啬。正如研究结果一样，我们都嫁了一个在理财方面与自己截然不同的男人；她的丈夫俭朴，而我的丈夫喜欢花钱。从那时起，我们都在向相反的方向变化。如今，我的妹妹擅长储蓄；在我们最近的家庭聚会中，她请40多人吃了两顿饭，凭借老道的购买低价商品的本事和在沃尔玛(Wal-Mart)采购，总共只花了不到250美元。而轮到我组织饭局时，我花了大约两倍的钱。