越来越多的人离婚。那么，婚姻破裂的原因是什么呢？
It’s a strange coincidence that I recently reconnected with three of my long-lost Chinese friends at almost the same time.
最近，我同时和三位失联已久的好友联系上了，真是太巧了。
One of them lives in Shenzhen, Guangdong Province now, because she got a divorce.
其中一人离婚了，现居住在广东省深圳。
Before I could reconcile to this news about her sudden change of events, two other friends also echoed the same word, "divorce."
还没等我接受她的生活突遭变故的事实，另外两个朋友也传来了同样的消息：离婚。
My curiosity propelled me to probe deeper into the reasons behind what happened, since at one time their relationships were the epitome of soul mates.
我的好奇心驱使我进一步去探查这背后的原因，因为，他们的感情曾一度是灵魂伴侣的典范。
After listening to their stories, I found a common thread to their painful separations. It was the fall from expectations.
在听了他们的故事后，我找到了他们痛苦分手的共同点：那就是期望值下滑。
When they started dating, everything appeared perfect, and the relationship was beautiful.
在他们开始约会时，每件事看起来都很完美，他们的感情很美好。
There was a deliberate attempt to "win" each other by doing whatever it takes to please the other. It was a time when they tried to show the best of themselves, and when they missed each other like crazy. Then they tied the knot. They became sure of each other, and all the excitement and suspense of the chase was over. They started showing their "real" selves.
他们愿意去做任何一件能让对方开心的事，希望能“赢得”对方。这个阶段，他们都想表现出最好的自己，他们疯狂的想念对方。然后，他们步入了婚姻的殿堂。他们觉得对方已经是自己的，当初追求时所有的兴奋和疑虑全都不再。他们开始展示“真实”的自己。
Impatience, rudeness, bad tempers and possessiveness came to the surface.
不耐烦、粗鲁、坏脾气和占有欲开始浮出水面。
These unexpected and unpalatable traits erupted like landmines as time passed by.
随着时间的推移，这些出人意料的、令人不快的特征就像地雷一样被引爆。
It is said that familiarity breeds contempt. The downside of this familiarity resulted in taking each other for granted.
有句话叫亲密生侮心。太过熟悉了反而就导致了一切都是理所当然。
They stated forgetting to give each other attention and respect. Slowly when compromise and patience gave way, they took that drastic step.
他们开始忘记关心、尊重对方。慢慢地，当他们不再妥协，不再忍耐，婚姻就走到了悬崖边上。
There are many lessons to learn from their unhappy endings. We all have offended our loved ones at one time or another by intruding into their personal space. Two people together are unique individuals in their own ways.
从他们的不幸结局中，我们可以吸取很多教训。我们都曾因为入侵爱人的私人领地而让对方不高兴。两个在一起的人是以各自独特的方式生存的个体。
Sometimes persistent concern can be misconstrued as intrusion. So we have to be careful with our words and behaviors.
有时，持续的关心也会被误解成干涉。所以我们得谨言慎行。
Some people are over-sensitive and emotional. It is not good to be insensitive to feelings of those closest to us.
有些人太过敏感、情绪化。而对亲近我们的人的感觉太过迟钝也是不好的。
We should not treat our significant other as extensions of ourselves and expect them to understand, accept and tolerate our irritable behavior.
我们不能将重要的另一半当作是自我的延伸，期待他们能理解、接受、忍受我们急躁的行为。
It is much easier to change yourself than to expect others to change.
改变自己总比期待他人改变要容易的多。
