工作场合永远不要说的13句话

　　In speaking with hundreds of executives and senior leaders over the past twenty years, certain phrases consistently come up as career-limiting phrases that jeopardize

　　one’s professional image and potential for promotion. To the speaker they may seem like harmless words, however, to the listener they reveal a more critical issue: In a workplace where employers must be cutting-edge, competitive, and cost-effective, employees who use these phrases will likely be replaced with those who convey a more positive attitude, collaborative spirit, proactive behavior and professional demeanor. Here are 13 phrases that should be banned from the office:通过过去二十年来和诸多高管及领导的交流，我发现有些话在职场中比较禁忌，可能会毁掉一个人的职业形象甚或升职机会。说者可能无意，但听者却会看到更为本质的问题：身处职场，员工必须走在前沿、具有竞争力并能节约成本，说话不当的员工很可能被态度积极、团结协作、主动采取行动并且专业有素的员工所取代。以下13句话就绝不能在办公室讲：

　　1. “It’s not fair。”1. “这不公平。”

　　She got a raise, you didn’t. He was recognized, you weren’t. Some people have food to eat while others starves. Injustices happen on the job and in the world every day. Whether it’s a troubling issue at work or a serious problem for the planet, the point in avoiding this phrase is to be proactive about the issues versus complaining, or worse, passively whining. Instead, document the facts, build a case, and present an intelligent argument to the person or group who can help you。她加薪了，你却没有；他受器重了，而你没有。有人温饱就有人挨饿，世界上不公平随处可见，职场也一样。不论是工作碰上麻烦还是地球遇到灾难，要避免不公平，就得积极解决问题，而不是抱怨或者消极发牢骚。相反，你应该实事求是地、向能够提供帮助的人或组织有理有据地来表达意见。

　　2. “That’s not my problem,” “That’s not my job,” or “I don’t get paid enough for this。”2. “那不是我的问题”，“那不是我的工作”或“这不是我的分内之事”。

　　If you asked someone for help, and the person replied with one of the above phrases, how would you feel? As importantly, what would it say about him or her? Regardless of how inconvenient or inappropriate a request may be, it is likely important to the other person or they would not have asked. Therefore, as a contributing member of the team, a top priority is to care about the success of others (or at least act as though you do). An unconcerned, detached and self-serving attitude quickly limits career advancement。如果你请某人帮忙，却得到上面这样的回答，你会怎么想？重要的是，说出这种话的人又能怎样呢？不管请求多么不方便或不恰当，如果不那么重要，别人也就不必开口求助了。所以，作为团队成员，首先应将他人的成功放第一位(或至少表示一下自己的心意)。冷漠离群、以自我为中心的态度很快便会断送职业发展。

　　This doesn’t mean you have to say yes; it does mean you need to be articulate

　　and thoughtful when saying no. For example, if your boss issues an unreasonable request, rather than saying, ‘you’ve got to be kidding me. I don’t get paid enough for this,’ instead say, ‘I’ll be glad to help. Given my current tasks of A, B, and C, which one of these shall I place on hold while I work on this new assignment?’ This clearly communicates teamwork and helpfulness, while reminding your boss of your current work load and the need to set realistic expectations。这并不是要你有求必应；只是告诉你三思之后再拒绝。例如，如果老板提出不合理的要求，不要说‘开什么玩笑，这根本就不是我的分内之事。’，而应回答‘没问题啊，但我手上还有A、B、C等任务，哪个任务可以暂放一放，以便完成这项新任务呢？’这样说不仅展现了团队精神和乐于助人，还提醒了老板你手上还有活儿，要求不可太过分。

　　3. “I think…”3. “我认为……”

　　Which of these two statements sounds more authoritative?: “I think our company might be a good partner for you。” Or, “I believe…” “I know…” or “I am confident that our company will be a good partner for you。”下面哪句话听上去更有力？：“我认为我们公司可能成为贵方的良好伙伴。”或“我相信/我知道/我确信我们公司将会成为贵方的良好伙伴。”

　　There is a slight difference in the wording, however the conviction

　　communicated to your customer is profound. You may have noticed, the first phrase contains two weak words, ‘think’ and ‘might.’ They risk making you sound unsure or insecure about the message. Conversely, the second sentence is assertive

　　and certain. To convey a command of content and passion for your subject, substitute the word ‘think’ with ‘believe’ and replace ‘might’ with ‘will.’只是用词略有变动，但传达给客户的信心却很不一样。你们应该注意到，第一句话中的‘认为’和‘可能’语气较弱，使信息听上去不那么确凿肯定。相反，第二句话则确信肯定多了。为表达你讲话内容的坚定和激情，应将‘认为’和‘可能’换成‘相信’和‘将要’。

　　4. “No problem。”4. “没问题。”

　　When someone thanks you, the courteous and polite reply is, “You’re welcome。”当有人向你表示感谢时，礼貌的回答是“不客气”。

　　The meaning implies that it was a pleasure for you to help the person, and that you receive their appreciation. Though the casual laid-back phrase, ‘no problem’ may intend to communicate this, it falls short. It actually negates the person’s appreciation and implies the situation could have been a problem under other circumstances. In business and social situations, if you want to be perceived as well-mannered and considerate, respond to thank you’ s with, “You’re welcome。”不客气表示你很乐意提供帮助，并且接受对方的感谢。虽然随意一点说‘没问题’也有同样的功能，但意思却远远不足，不仅忽略了对方的感激之情，而且还暗指这个忙在别的情况下可能是个‘问题’。在职场及社会上，如果你想表现得体贴有教养，还是用“不客气”来回答别人的感谢吧。

　　5. “I’ll try。”5. “我试试看。”

　　Imagine it’s April 15th and you ask a friend to mail your tax returns before 5pm on his way to the post office. If he replies, ‘Okay, I’ll try,’ you’ll likely feel the need to mail them yourself. Why? Because that phrase implies the possibility of failure。假设4月15号那天，你请朋友在下午5点之前顺路去邮局替你寄申报单，朋友回答说‘好啊，我试试看吧。’，你是不是觉得不放心，还是亲自去寄的好呢？为什么会这样？因为“试试看”表示事情也有可能做不好。

　　In your speech, especially with senior leaders, replace the word ‘try’ with the word and intention of ‘will.’ This seemingly small change speaks volumes。“在你讲话的时候，尤其是面对上级领导，请把‘试试看’换成‘会去做’。改变虽小，意义却很重大。

　　6. “He’s a jerk,” or “She’s lazy,” or “My job stinks,” or “I hate this company。”6. “他是个傻瓜”，“她很懒”，“我的工作真糟糕”或“我讨厌这家公司”。

　　Nothing tanks a career faster than name-calling. Not only does it reveal juvenile school-yard immaturity, it’s language that is liable and fire-able。没什么能比说脏话更快地搞垮职业生涯了。说脏话不仅表示你跟小孩一样幼稚，还可能招来祸患。

　　Avoid making unkind, judgmental statements that will inevitably reflect poorly on you. If you have a genuine complaint about someone or something, communicate the issue with tact, consideration and neutrality。千万别说恶意评价，否则最后只能自己受害。如果你确实对某人或某事有意见，还是老练、细致并中立地沟通解决吧。

　　7. “But we’ve always done it that way。”7. “但这是我们的惯例。”

　　The most effective leaders value innovation, creative thinking and problem solving skills in their employees. In one fell swoop, this phrase reveals you are the opposite: stuck in the past, inflexible, and closed-minded. Instead say, ‘Wow, that’s an interesting idea. How would that work?’ Or, ‘That’s a different approach. Let’s discuss the pros and cons.’最有效率的领导重视员工的革新、创新思维以及解决问题的能力。但这句话一下子就把你推向了对立面：墨守成规、死板、教条。相反，你应该说“哇，这个想法有意思。接下来该怎么办？”或“这又是另一种方法，那我们来探讨一下利弊吧。”

　　8. “That’s impossible” or “There’s nothing I can do。”8. “那不可能”或“我一筹莫展”

　　Really? Are you sure you’ve considered every single possible solution and the list is now exhausted? When you make the mistake of saying these negative phrases, your words convey a pessimistic, passive, even hopeless outlook. This approach is seldom valued in the workplace. Employers notice, recognize and promote a can-do attitude. Despite the glum circumstances, communicate through your words what you can contribute to the situation。真的吗？你确定已考虑过所有可能的方案、真的穷途末路了吗？“当你犯错说出这种消极的话时，说明你为人消极悲观甚或决绝，职场向来鄙视这种态度。员工必须养成‘能行’的态度。不管情况多么不容乐观，你都应该从话语上提醒自己面对现实解决问题。

　　Instead, try something like, “I’ll be glad to check on it again,” “Let’s discuss what’s possible under these circumstances,” or, “What I can do is this。”所以，你应该说“我还是在检查一遍吧”、“让我们看看这种情况下还能有什么办法”或“我能做些什么呢”。

　　9. “You should have…” or “You could have…”9. “你本应该……”或“你本可以……”

　　You probably wouldn’t be thrilled

　　if someone said: “You should have told me about this sooner!” Or, “You could have tried a little harder。” Chances are, these fault-finding words inflict feelings of blame and finger-pointing. Ideally, the workplace fosters

　　equality, collaboration and teamwork. Instead of making someone feel guilty (even if they are)， take a more productive non-judgmental approach. Say, “Next time, to ensure proper planning, please bring this to my attention immediately。” Or, “In the future, I recommend…”如果有人跟你说“你本该早点告诉我”或“你本可以再努力一点”，你肯定感到闷闷不乐。这些挑刺儿的话含有指责意味。而理想的职场下应该是平等、团队与协作。与其让别人倍感愧疚(即便他们确实感到愧疚)，还不如换个积极中立的说法，比如‘下次计划恰当了就请立即告诉我吧’或‘以后我希望……’”

　　10. “You guys。”10. “伙计们。”

　　Reserve the phrase “you guys” for friendly casual conversations and avoid using it in business. Referring to a group of people as ‘you guys’ is not only inaccurate if women are present, it is slang and lowers your level of professionalism. With fellow professionals such as your boss, co-workers and clients, substitute “you guys” with terms such as “your organization” or “your team” or simply “you。”“伙计们”用法比较随意，职场中应尽量避免。用‘伙计们’指称一群人并不恰当，由其是有女性在场的时候；而且这是个俗词，有可能降低你的职业素养。如果有老板、同事及客户等职业人士在场，还是用“贵公司”、“贵方团队”或“贵方”比较妥当。

　　11. “I may be wrong, but…” or “This may be a silly idea, but…”11. “有可能是我错了，但……”或“这个想法或许有点蠢，但……”

　　These phrases are known as discounting. They diminish the impact of what follows and reduce your credibility. Remember that your spoken words reveal to the world how much value you place on yourself and your message. For this reason, eliminate any prefacing phrase that demeans the importance of who you are or lessens the significance of what you contribute。这些话语听上去就像在讨价还价。它们不仅削弱了后面话语的影响力，也降低了你本人的可信度。你说出去的话就是在告知世界你的价值观和想要传达的信息。因此，别拐弯儿强调你多厉害或你谦虚自己所作的贡献。

　　Don’t say, “This may be a silly idea, but I was thinking that maybe we might conduct the quarterly meeting online instead, okay?” Instead, assert your recommendation: “To reduce travel costs and increase time efficiency, I recommend we conduct the quarterly meeting online。”别说什么“这个想法或许有点蠢，但我觉得或许我们可以网上召开季度会议，怎么样？”，相反，你应该这么建议：“为节约旅费和时间，我建议网上召开季度会议。”

　　12. “Don’t you think?” or “Okay?”12. “你不觉得吗？”或“好吗？”

　　These phrases are commonly known as hedging—seeking validation through the use of overly cautious

　　or non-committal words. If you truly are seeking approval or looking for validation, these phrases may well apply. However, if your goal is to communicate a confident commanding message and persuade people to see it your way, instead of hedging make your statement or recommendation with certainty。这种话通常是因过分谨慎或为不承担责任而寻求对方赞同。如果你真想寻求赞同或认可，这倒也没什么问题。但是，如果你是想传达确切信息、使人按你的意思理解问题，你就应该更加确定地讲明才行。

　　Imagine an investment banker saying, “This is a good way to invest your money, don’t you think? I’ll proceed, if that’s okay with you。” Instead, you’d probably want to hear something like: “This strategy is a wise investment that provides long-term benefits. With your approval, I’ll wire the money by 5pm today。”假设投资银行家说“这是个理财的好方法，你不觉得吗？如果你觉得可行，那我就继续。”，你肯定觉得奇怪，正常应该是这么说：“这是个明智的投资战略，可获取长期利益。只要你同意，我今天下午5点就汇钱。”

　　13. “I don’t have time for this right now,” or “I’m too busy。”13. “我现在没有时间”或“我都忙死了”

　　Even if these statements are true, no one wants to feel less important than something or someone else. To foster positive relations and convey empathy, say instead: I’d be happy to discuss this with you after my morning meetings. May I stop by your office around 1pm?”就算你说的都是事实，也没人愿意觉得自己还不如其他事或其他人重要。要想维持良好关系并赢得同感，你应该说：“我早上开完会后就有空跟你讨论这个问题了，下午1点左右我去你办公室怎么样？”

　　These are common phrases that might be difficult to eliminate completely from your everyday conversations—but the trick is to gain awareness of the language you’re using. As is often the case with bad habits, we are unconscious of the fact we’re saying career-limiting words and phrases。这些常见的话语可能一时难以立即完全从你的日常讲话中改正——但是，你可以加强防范，随时留意自己所讲的话。坏习惯总是不自觉的，我们有时并不能意识到在讲一些祸害职业的话语。