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新浪首页 > 教育天地 > 《英语学习》2002年8期 > 你想要的东西

The Thing You Want
http://www.sina.com.cn 2002/08/30 09:56  《英语学习》

  

  Outside of what was left of Atlanta, they discovered the great brick house, hidden in a thick grove of walnut trees. The grass was so high in the yard around it that the blades had fallen over into brown clumps beneath their own weight.

  They assumed it was abandoned, a prime target for a hiatus from the monotonous routine of marching and standing for reveille three times daily to identify stragglers. Since the young lieutenant was away tending to another small matter, they drifted closer and found themselves in an alternative world of silence and loneliness.

  The war had not touched the house with slugs or shells. Rather, an invisible icy hand had peeled paint away and wilted flowers, leaving a dead flavor to it, as if it were somehow like one of the thousands of soldier corpses left on the battlefield unburied to slowly rot away. They walked right up to the porticoed entrance and started to open the oak door. Someone inside, however, plucked it open first.

  “What do you want?”

  A withered, languorous old woman stared at them blankly.

  “What do you want?”she said again, more irritably.

  Cabe stepped across the threshold and brushed her aside. The darkened hallway smelled of cinnamon and lanolin, a combination that made him think of Egyptian mummies. He reasoned that the kitchen would probably be near the back of the house, so he started that direction, careful not to trip over any hidden obstacles.

  “There’s nothing back there,”the old woman protested, pulling at his sleeve.

  Cabe ripped his arm away and ignored her. There was a yellow light further along that contained the promise of something hidden.

  “The only food I have is out in the cellar,”she said, her voice cracking, something dying in it. Cabe pushed a door open and discovered the kitchen, a bright room filled with hanging pots, a long bare table, and a cavernous stone fireplace which didn誸appear to have been used in a great deal of time.

  He also discovered a remarkable creature standing in the corner beside a large cupboard, poised as if about to climb inside. She was frozen in a moment of unbridled fear, though Cabe could see immediately that she was unusually beautiful, a rare flower on the cusp of blooming.

  He stopped to study her and found that all thoughts and desires for food had evaporatedsintosthe silence. It had been months since he had seen anything that could stir that deeply buried portion of his instinct that now cried out so dramatically. In fact, he had been at home, on leave, when the last such surge occurred.

  <2>Now he looked at the sun colored dress, which made her velvet hair look like a flowery disk surrounded by daisy petals, and he realized that it was absurd to ignore it. He moved several steps closer and she still remained motionless, a statue of unknown substance, though definitely warm and alive.

  “What are you doing?”Cabe asked her softly.

  “Leave her alone!”the old woman said, appearing behind him suddenly with clenched fists and black marble eyes.

  “Get her out of here,”Cabe said, and the other soldiers complied, the door shutting behind them as they left. Cabe moved another step closer.

  “What are you doing?”he asked again.

  She still refused to look at him, though he could see movement now; her slender hands trembling and her lips mouthing attempts at some kind of speech.

  “I’m just looking after my grandmother,”she said suddenly.

  Cabe snorted."It looks the other way around to me.”

  He moved one more step closer.

  The war was so insane. There was nothing good about it; no redeeming ethic or cause worthy of so much suffering. Beyond a certain impossibleness, right and wrong didn't matter anymore, and behavior was strictly a manifestation of the chaos around it.

  No one deserved what they got, good or bad.

  “You’re very beautiful,”he whispered.

  She turned away from him to face the wall, as if unwilling to confront reality straight on. It bothered Cabe that she did that. He reached out with one hand and pulled on her shoulder somewhat roughly until she spun around.

  When her amber eyes finally made unwilling but inevitable contact with his, Cabe felt a shock that was both terrible and thrilling. In her eyes was a color so startling, so unpredicted, that it almost threw himsintosa kind of battlefield shock. She quickly looked down, but the magnetic force had already taken hold.

  “You’re about the only damn thing I’ve seen around here that’s not worth putting a slugsintoswithout any questions.”

  He carefully set his rifle down on the table, without taking his gaze off her. He ran his fingers through her hair and turned her head around again.

  “Where did you get those eyes?”

  The shaking moved from her hands up through her neck to her face and lips. The wall was behind her; Cabe solidly in front of her.

  < 3 >

  “What do you want?”she said, her voice trembling like everything else.

  “What do all men want?”he said brusquely, reaching for bright yellow petals.

  At that moment someone else entered the room. Cabe had the sixth sense common to survivors of war, and he turned around to reach for his weapon.

  “What are you doing?”the young lieutenant asked, picking up Cabe’s rifle and holding it in a neutral position.

  “Looking for food, sir.”

  “You won’t find it in her dress, Private. Get out of here before this rifle accidentally discharges.”Cabe tried to glare at the young officer with hatred and found he couldn’t. Instead, he looked back at the girl. Her position had not changed, and her eyes were still demurely averted.

  Outside, everything appeared normal again. No one asked any questions. Something inside of him was dead, though, and at the same time, a tiny spark was flickering. No one deserved what they got.

你想要的东西

  

  在残垣断墙的亚特兰大城外,他们发现了那座

  高大的砖房,隐藏在一片浓密的核桃树林里。房子周围院子里的草长得很高,叶子因为承受不了自身的重量,歪倒在棕黄色的泥土里。

  他们猜想这座房子已经荒弃。正好可以用来歇个脚,打破一下每天三次为了查掉队士兵而列队操练的单调。年轻的中尉此刻正在别处处理另一件事,士兵们便漫无目的地走近房子,发现置身在另一个寂静凄凉的世界。

  战争并没有在这座房子上留下任何枪弹的痕迹。但是,似有一只无形冰冷之手剥落了墙上的油漆,使花朵凋谢,留下腐朽死寂的气息,仿佛战场上来不及掩埋的成千具士兵尸体中的一具,留在那里慢慢腐烂。

  士兵们朝有门廊的大门径直走去,正要推开橡木门。里面有人却先把门打开了。

  “你们想干吗?”

  一个行动迟缓的干瘪老妇人目无表情地瞪着他们。

  “你们想干什么?”她又说了一遍,这次语气有些急躁。

  卡布一脚跨过门槛,把她推开。昏暗的走廊里弥漫着肉桂和羊毛脂的味道。这两种气味混杂在一起让他想起了埃及的木乃伊。他推断厨房可能在房子的后部,就向那个方向走去,一边留心着脚下不要踩到任何障碍物。

  老妇人拉着他的袖子,想阻止他,“后面什么东西也没有。”

  卡布甩开胳膊,不理她。走廊那头有一盏黄色的灯,预示着那里藏着一些东西。

  “吃的都在地窖里,”她的声音嘶哑,带着一丝绝望。

  卡布推开一扇门,发现了厨房。厨房里很明亮,挂满了瓶瓶罐罐,有一张长桌,桌上什么也没有。还有一个又大又深的石砌壁炉,看起来很长时间没有用过了。

  他还发现大橱柜边上的角落里站着一个尤物,从她的姿势看,她正准备爬到碗橱里去。无边的恐惧使她愣在那里,尽管如此卡布还是立刻就注意到她非同寻常的美丽,象是一枝正在盛开的珍贵花朵。

  他停下来仔细打量着她,发现自己对食物所有的渴望和想念全都消失在这一片寂静之中。他已经有几个月没有看见任何可以激起他最深处本能的东西了,而现在这种本能如此强烈地爆发出来。确切地说,上一次激情的爆发是他休假在家的时候。

  <2>现在,他看着那条金黄色的裙子,它使她那丝绒般的头发看起来象雏菊花瓣围绕的花盘。

  他意识到不可能不注意到它。他朝她走近了几步,而她仍然站在那里一动不动,像一尊不知为何物的雕塑,只不过肯定是温热鲜活的。

  “你在干什么?”卡布轻声问她。

  “别碰她!”老妇人突然出现在他身后,紧握着拳头,瞪着黑眼珠。

  “把她弄出去。”卡布说。其他几个士兵把老妇人弄了出去,并且随手把门关上。卡布又朝女孩走近了一步。

  “你在干什么?”他又问。

  她仍然拒绝看他,但他现在可以看到一些动作了:她纤细的手颤抖着,嘴唇微张,试图想说些什么。

  “我只是在照顾我的祖母。”她突然说。

  卡布鼻子里哼了一声,“怎么我看到的情况好像恰好相反。”

  他又朝前挪了一步。

  战争是如此的疯狂。没有丝毫的良知;没有任何道德原则或事业值得人去忍受如此巨大的痛苦。在某种极限之后,是非都已经无关紧要,一个人的行为完完全全地印证了周围环境的混乱。

  没有人应该得到他所得的,无论是好还是坏。

  “你很美。”他低语道。

  她转过身,面对着墙,好像不愿意直面现实。

  她这么做让卡布很不高兴,他伸出手,有点粗鲁地去掰她的肩膀,直到她转过身来。

  当她那琥珀色的眼睛不情愿地但却无法避免地与他的眼睛对视,卡布突然可感到一种既突然又兴奋的震撼。她眼睛的颜色是如此迷人,如此出人意料,几乎将他置于战场上的那种震撼中。她很快低下头,但是那魅力的力量已经抓住了他的心。

  “你差不多是我在这周围看到的惟一不用照着就开枪的东西。”

  他把步枪小心地放在桌上,眼睛却一刻没有离开她。他用手指穿过她的头发,又一次将她的头扳了过来。

  “你哪来的这双眼睛?”

  从她的双手到她的脖子,她的脸和她的唇都在哆嗦。背后是墙,面前就直挺挺地站着他。

  <3>

  “你想干什么?”她说,声音也一样在颤抖。

  “所有的男人想要什么?”他粗鲁地说,把手伸向明亮的黄色花瓣。

  就在这时,另一个人走了进来。卡布像所有的战争幸存者一样有第六感觉,他转过身,想去拿放在桌上的武器。

  “你在干什么?”年轻的中尉问道,说着拿起卡布的枪,摆着一副蓄势而待的姿势。

  “长官,我在找吃的。”

  “你在她的裙子里可找不到,下士。出去,否则这枪会走火。”

  卡布想用仇恨的眼光瞪视这个年轻的长官,却做不到。他回头看了女孩一眼。她没有动,眼睛仍然朝着另一个方向,安静而庄重。

  外面,一切又归于正常。没人问任何问题。他体内某些东西已然死去,但同时,又有一个小火花在闪动。没有人应该得到他所得的。




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