四、布局独树一帜

　　1. 立意新颖.请看下文:

　　Since several students share one room, they are all members of the group. Even if it is impossible for them to help each other, they should at least be aware of the existence of the others. It's true that everyone has got his own habit in life and his right to live in his own way; but this should be a rule that his living-way and habit should not become a headache to his roommates. For example, Mr. Nap and Mr. Rock are two roommates on our campus. Mr. Nap is in the habit of taking a nap after lunch; while Mr. Rock loves to listen to Rock and Roll to help digesting. In this dorm, there thus is a possible conflict that, whether Mr. Nap should give up his nap or Mr. Rock should turn off his recorder. If there had been a dorm policy, Mr. Nap would have felt better supported and Mr. Rock should have stopped his special way of digesting on condition that he is not very forgetful.

　　该文杜撰了两个人物Mr. Nap 和Mr. Rock, 巧妙地影射前者有午睡习惯,而后者为摇滚乐爱好者,且有饭后欣赏的习惯,两人同处一室,其不言而喻的矛盾得以轻松幽默地展现。阅卷教师给该篇文章高分是不容置疑的。

　　2. 内容连贯。英语短文要求段落中的句子之间衔接要自然、流畅,层次安排要清晰,合乎逻辑。也就是说短文要条理清楚,层次分明。而为了达到连贯的效果,必须使用一些过渡词语,这些过渡词语也叫作"启、承、转、合"语。其目的就是将各句之间、各段之间的逻辑关系清楚地展示阅卷老师面前。试比较下面两例:

　　A. Since he met this beautiful girl at the seaside, (1)he fell in love with her.(2) He was a sophisticated and cautious man,(3)and knew to express his idea too soon might spoil their friendship.(4)He had held back his feeling and only selected the topic which makes Tao-ching happy.(5)

　　B. He had fallen in love with this beautiful girl when he met her at the seaside. However, he was such a sophisticated and cautious man that he knew that revealing his love too eagerly might spoil their friendship, so he had held back his feelings and talked only of subjects likely to please Tao-ching.

　　分析A段,可以看出,(1)是(2)的时间状语,而(3)同前面相比是一种转折关系,(4)是(3)的递进,又表示(5)的原因。而A在句式安排上几乎完全按照中文模式,在(2)和(3)之间,(4)和(5)之间没有任何关联成分,导致句式较散。这些关系在B段中得到了很好的体现,所以句子结构显得紧凑严密。

　　诚然,无论怎样条分缕析,无论怎样深入剖解,都无法取代学生的写作实践、课外的广泛阅读以及对优美的、经典的例句的搜集和背诵。希望本文的分析会对写作有所裨益;而若能将体会与所得付诸实践,那么在四、六级作文考试中取得高分,就不会是可望而不可及的事情。

　　(全文完)

　　(文/张正荣　英语辅导报大学教师版04~05学年第8期;版权归英语辅导报社所有，独家网络合作伙伴新浪教育，未经许可，不得以任何形式进行转载。)