01
中国哪里的姑娘最漂亮？
Where can you find the most beautiful girls in China？
“
微信朋友圈
WeChat Moments
”
02
请给出一句很有内涵的诗句
Please name a thought-provoking sentence from a poem。
“
一懒众衫小
Once lazy， all your clothes get smaller。
”
03
如何理解“穷不是一种状态”？
What‘s the meaning of ’poverty is not a certain situation‘？
“
穷是一种常态
It‘s the common situation。
”
04
问世上不会游泳的动物是？
What animals on earth can not swim？
“
媳妇和妈
Your wife and your mother。
”
05
如果被车撞飞10米远，
爬起来之后说什么最帅？
What is the coolest thing to say after you got hit by a car and managed to stand up again？
“
下一辆
Next！
”
06
妈，我是你的什么？
Mother， what am I to you？
“
妈的智障
My karma。
”
07
为什么前女友还会一直关注我呢？
What could be the reason that my ex still follows me on social networks？
“
知道你过得不好我也就放心了
Knowing that you still mess everything up makes my day。
”
08
为什么打群架的时候
普遍会脱掉上衣？
Why do people usually take off their clothes when starting a gang fight？
“
假如脱掉裤子的话
总觉得有哪里不对，气氛怪怪的
Because it would be weird to take off your pants。
”
09
怎么反驳“你行你上啊”的逻辑？
How should I respond to ‘You can you up’？
“
我评论个鸡蛋不好吃，还得自己下个蛋啊？
So I need to lay an egg to criticize an egg‘s flavor？
”
10
如何一个月减肥40斤？
By what means can I lose 20 kilograms in a month？
“
截肢
Amputation。
”
11
怎样含蓄地表达
‘我已经被收买了’
How can I subtly suggest that I‘ve been compromised？
“
我说句公道话……
Let me say this impartially。。。
”
12
为什么你长痘痘？
Why do you have pimples？
“
因为我可爱得冒泡
Because I‘m just bubble-bubbly cute。
”
13
打雷的时候关窗户有用吗？
Does it work to close the window when it‘s thundering outside？
“
没用的，我试过了
关了窗雷一样在打
No， it won‘t。 I’ve tried。
It was still thundering outside after I closed the window。
”
14
你见过哪些概率极小极小的事件？
What extremly-small-probability event have you witnessed？
“
20道完形填空，全错
Done a cloze test of 20 questions
with 0 answer right。
”
15
妹子还书的时候夹了一张面巾纸
什么意思？
What does a girl mean when she return your book but with a facial tissue in it？
“
说明你对人家有意思
This means you are paying extra attention to her。
”
16
两千元人民币，想出国穷游
可以去哪些国家？
To which country can I do a budget travel with 2，000 RMB？
“
秦鲁齐蜀韩郑魏楚赵燕吴等等。。。
For example，
all the ancient countries that used to be China。
”
17
想养一只鹦鹉
教它说一些什么话好？
I wanna keep a parrot as pet。 What would be cool to teach it to say？
“
救命，我被变成鹦鹉了！
Help！
They‘ve turned me into a parrot！
”
18
呆萌和脑残的界限是？
What is the boundry between ‘clumsy’ and ‘stupid’？
“
和
the and
”
19
为什么女生有体香，而男生没有？
Why do women give out sweet scent but men don‘t？
“
化妆品腌入味了
The makeup is fermenting。
”
20
男生说什么话
女生会觉得很大气？
What would be manly for a man to say in front of a girl？
“
买
I‘ll pay。
”
21
热恋是一种怎样的体验？
How does it feel to love somebody insanely？
“
两个长得像猪一样的人
还怕对方被抢走了。。
Two people who are on no aspect attractive worry about each other being stolen by someone else。
”
22
有什么赞扬让你比较尴尬？
Is there any compliment that makes you awkward？
“
人不可貌相啊
We really cannot judge a book by its cover， can we？
”
23
你怎么一个人逛街啊？
Why are you shopping all by yourself？
“
半个人逛街我怕吓着你
I fear it would scare you to death if I were shopping all by no one。
”
24
单身两年以上是什么体验？
How does it feel to be single for more than 2 years？
“
单身22年
不知道你说的是哪两年？
I‘ve been single for 22 years。
Which 2 years are you suggesting？
”
25
地球外面那一层叫什么？
How do you call the outside layer of Earth？
“
香飘飘奶茶
Xiang Piao Piao milk tea。
”
26
要是在古代
姐的颜值能撑起整个青楼
Back in the ancient times， a face like mine can hold a whole brothel。
“
你是说你长得像柱子吗？
You mean you look like a pillar？
”
27
很高兴为你服务
I‘m glad to be at your service。
“
你高兴得太早了
You‘ll find out you got glad too fast。
”
28
北冥有鱼，其名为鲲
Once in the northern sea， there was a fish and people called it Kun。
“
众人食之，完
And people ate it。
The end。
”
29
妈，我能看电视吗？
Mom， can I watch the television？
“
当然可以啊，只要不打开就行
Of course you can， as long as it‘s turned off。
”
30
你得揣摩出题人的意图
You need to understand why they set this question in the first place。
“
他想我死
They want me dead。
”
31
你知道吗？你最终会变成你讨厌的人
You know what？ You eventually become someone you loathe。
“
借你吉言，我讨厌有钱人
Thanks， I loathe people who are rich。
”
32
国庆去北京旅游有什么好建议吗？
Gonna be traveling in Beijing during the National Day vacation。 Any suggestion？
“
别去
Don‘t go。
”
33
等我瘦了就回来找你
I‘ll come back for you when I get slim。
“
如果你不想见我，其实可以直说
You can level with me if you don‘t want to see me。
”
34
有史以来最伟大的虚构人物是谁？
Who is the greatest fictional character in history？
“
别人家的小朋友
Someone else‘s child。
”
35
你看看别人家的男朋友
都是吃女朋友吃剩下的饭！！！
Look at other girls‘ boyfriends。 They eat their grilfriends’ leftover。
“
那你倒是给我剩点啊
Sounds as if you ever left any over。
”
36
为什么秀恩爱通常选择在中午？
Why do people always show off their relationships at noon？
“
因为早晚会有报应
Because sooner or later karma will come to them。
”
37
请用一个词来形容你的男朋友
Please use one word to describe your boyfriend。
“
哪？
Where？
”
38
被人追了怎么拒绝？
How do I successfully reject someone who is pursuing me？
“
接地卸妆
Remove your makeup， right now， right there。
”
39
为了让你好好学习，父母都给过你什么？
What did your parents give you to make you study harder？
“
这张脸
This face。
”
40
参观一个世界奇观时
你最想了解哪些信息？
What do you want to know the most when you visit a World Wonder？
“
这附近有什么好吃的吗？
What can I find to eat around there？
”
41
我要如何才能显得很高冷？
How can I look high-end and cool？
“
搬去喜马拉雅
Move to the Himalayas。
”
42
为什么有的男生追女生追到一半不追了？
Why do some boys give up half-way pursuing a girl？
“
你倒是给个进度条啊
Why don‘t you display a progress bar？
”
43
为什么在洗完澡之后
有些人会觉得自己变漂亮了？
Why do some people find themselves prettier after they take a shower？
“
脑子进水了
The brain has water damage。
”
来源：沪江英语
责任编辑：陈熙
