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老外直言:长着中国脸 我是美国人
http://www.sina.com.cn 2002/06/13 09:58  北京青年报

  (本文作者为美籍华人,现在中国地质大学任教)

   Sometimes I think my students are more interested in learning about the United States than about English grammar and vocabulary. They appear more excited when we talk about university life in the United States than when we discuss the correct usage of the present perfect tense. They ask more questions when I bring up the topic of life as an American teenager than when I try to explain gerunds. Even though my students worked very hard to get a good score on the Band 4 exam, I think they would have preferred to discuss a movie like Forrest Gump or The Truman Show.

  Like many foreign English teachers I know, I begin every semester by instructing each student to ask me something, anything. I tell them that I'll answer almost every question. Then I wait. Without fail, one of the first questions I am always asked is, "Are you Chinese? You look Chinese."

  I don't mind being asked this question, and I always answer in the same way: "I'm American," I say. This usually draws objections from the students. Someone will usually ask me why I don't say that I am an overseas Chinese. To this, I reply that I was born and raised in the US. My life has been firmly located in the US and "overseas" in Europe. More hands will go up, and others will ask, "Why do you look Chinese?"Or, "If you're American, how come you don't look American?", and "Why did you come back to China?" To the last question I usually respond, "I didn't come back to China. I've never been to China before, so I couldn't have 'come back' at all."

  My purpose in coming to China was simple: I wanted to learn Chinese and believed that living here would be the best way to do so. My Chinese-born parents tried to teach me Mandarin when I was a child, but I resisted their efforts and could only speak very brokenly. I never learned to read or write any characters except those in my name. When I was about ten years old, I was sent to a Chinese school on Saturday mornings.I hated it - I never did the homework and didn't pay attention in class. Eventually my parents let me drop out of the school. I think they knew I would want to learn Chinese again later in life and decided just to wait until I chose to learn it for myself.

  Many people of Chinese ancestry come to China insgroupsto find "their" roots, to learn about "their" history, and to experience "their" culture. This phenomenon is not unique to China or the Chinese; many people of European heritage travel to Germany or Ireland or Russia to do the same. They study Swedish or Italian because their grandparents or great-grandparents came from these countries. The same goes for people of all ethnic backgrounds. We are just trying to figure out who we are and what that means. Oftentimes this search becomes a quest for tradition, for an understanding of the past insgroupsto explain our present situation.

  Although I have relatives who live in Beijing and throughout China, I do not believe I will find myself or better understand myself simply because I have lived in China. To me, China is a foreign country and I am a foreigner here. There are advantages and disadvantages to "looking" Chinese in China - sometimes I am able to get a lower price than other foreigners when I am bargaining, and I find that many Chinese are more comfortable talking to me because I look Chinese. On the other hand, I have met a few people who would not believe my English is as good as that of other, non-Chinese-looking foreigners. Once, on a train, the conductor asked me if I had passed the Band Six exam. When I explained to him that in the US students don't take the band examinations, he asked me what my TOEFL score was. I said that English was my first language, so there was no need for me to take the TOEFL.

  It does not bother me when people ask such questions. Curiosity is a sign of the desire to understand the world around us better. As a Chinese-American living in China, I know I have the responsibility to answer in a thoughtful manner. I am just as proud of my American upbringing as I am of my Chinese appearance. I am also lucky that my parents were raised in a different culture so that they could teach me a little about a place far away from my home in California. What matters the most to me is the ability to communicate with others, regardless of nationality or cultural background; we can learn a lot from each other and that is the main reason I came to live in Beijing.

老外直言:长着中国脸 我是美国人

  有时候我觉得我的学生对美国的兴趣比对英语语法和词汇的兴趣更大。与讨论如何正确使用现在完成时相比,当我们谈起美国大学的生活时,他们显得更为兴奋。当我把话题转到美国少男少女的生活时,他们提出的问题就比我在解释动名词时更多。虽然我的学生学习很刻苦,以便在大学英语四级考试中得到好成绩,但我觉得他们还是更愿意讨论诸如《阿甘正传》和《楚门的世界》等电影。

  像我认识的很多英语外教一样,新学期开始时我都引导每个学生向我提出问题,可以提任何问题。我告诉他们我会回答几乎所有的问题,之后我便等待他们提问。而屡试不爽的是,最先提出的问题之一就是:“你是中国人吗?你长得像中国人。”

  我不在乎被问及这个问题,我总是这样回答:“我是美国人。”但是这往往招来学生的反对。有的学生常常问我为什么不说自己是海外华人,对此我答道我生在美国长在美国,我的生活已经牢牢地限定在了美国以及“海外”的欧洲。更多的手会举起来,有人会问:“那你为什么长得像中国人?”或是问“如果你是美国人,长得怎么不像美国人?”“你为什么要回到中国?”对于最后的那个问题,我通常答道:“我不是回到中国。以前我从没有在中国待过,所以根本不可能是‘回来’。”

  我来中国的目的很简单:我想学中文,并且相信在这儿生活是学习中文的最好途径。在我还是小孩子时,我的父母(他们出生在中国)想教我学习普通话,可是我偏不学,所以只会零星地说几句。除了我的名字,我也从来不认不写任何汉字。在我大约十岁的时候,父母在每周六上午送我去一所中文学校,可我讨厌学中文——我从来不做作业,上课也不认真听讲。终于,父母让我离开了那所学校。我想他们知道我会在以后的某个时候想重学中文,于是决定等待,一直等到我自己选择了学习中文的那一天。

  很多有中国血统的人来到中国,来寻“他们的”根,来学“他们的”历史,来体验“他们的”文化,这一现象并非是中国或中国人独有。很多有欧洲血统的人到德国、爱尔兰或俄罗斯去做同样的事情。他们学习瑞典语或意大利语,因为他们的祖父母或曾祖父母来自这些国家。同样的事情发生在各个民族背景的人当中。我们只是想搞清楚我们是谁,以及这意味着什么,这种寻根往往会成为对传统、对往事的理解所进行的求索,以期解释我们的现状。

  虽然我在北京以及其他省有亲戚,但我并不相信仅仅因为我住在中国就能找到自我或更深地了解自己。对于我来说,中国是外国,而我在这儿是个外国人。在中国长得像中国人有利也有弊——在买东西讨价还价时,我会得到比其他外国人低的价格,我还发现因为我长得像中国人,很多中国人与我交谈时就更自在。但另一方面,我也遇到一些人不相信我的英语与那些长得不像中国人的老外一样好。有一次我坐火车,列车员问我是否通过了大学英语六级考试,当我解释美国学生不参加这种等级考试时,他又问我的托福分数是多少,我说英语是我的第一语言,我不必参加托福考试。

  当人们问我这类问题时,我并不觉得烦。好奇心是渴望更好地了解我们周围的世界的标志。作为一个住在中国的美籍华人,我知道我有责任细心周到地回答问题。正如我为我的中国人相貌而自豪一样,我也为我在美国受到的培养而自豪。我也很幸运,我的父母在另一种文化中长大,因此他们能够教给我一些离我在加利福尼亚的家很远的国度的知识。对我来说,最重要的事情是,具备与他人交流的能力,无论这些人的国籍与文化背景是什么;我们可以相互学习,这就是我来到北京的主要原因。




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