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　　1. Diversify Friends

　　与多种类型的朋友交往

　　Everyone needs a best friend. But early on in the school year,your kid needs to make as many friends as possible. Young students tend to latch on to one friend. Unfortunately, there will come aday when your kid’s sole friend plays with another child and it will happen–I see ‘best friends’ form and break up daily. Your kid will feel left out, betrayed–maybe even isolated. In short, it’ll destroy their day. If you explain early on that it’s OK to play with different friends, they’ll be more likely to find anotherfriend to play with instead of sulking in a corner。

　　每个人都需要一个好朋友。但是在开始进入学校的时候，你的孩子就应该有很多朋友。小孩子往往只喜欢和他其中的一个朋友黏在一起。但是将来有一天，孩子唯一的那个朋友也会和别的孩子玩到一起，这是可能会发生的-----我看到过“好朋友”也有闹别扭的。你的孩子会觉得自己被抛弃了，被背叛了---甚至还可能会有被孤立的感觉。简而言之，这样会毁掉他的生活。要是你在很早的时候就对他说过：和很多不一样的朋友一起玩也是好的，他们更可能愿意找其他的朋友一起玩，而不仅仅是只和一个朋友玩耍。

　　2.Good Friends are Proactive Friends

　　好朋友得是那种积极主动地朋友

　　Teach your child to go out of their way to be a good friend toothers. You can begin this by pointing out helpful opportunities。“Sarah, James needs help tying his shoes–you know how to do that–goask him if he needs help。” Or “Alex, I bet Lilly would like it ifyou help her open her milk carton。” Then praise them for their kindness afterwards. Soon, Sarah and Alex will find ways to help on their own–it’s all about reinforcing good habits they don’t knowe xist。

　　把你的孩子教育成那种对别人来说可能会是好朋友的那种人。你可以从点出那些可以帮助别人的机会开始。“莎拉，吉姆斯试鞋子需要你的帮助---你知道怎么做吧---去问问他是否需要帮助。”或者“艾利克斯，我敢说要是你能帮丽丽打开她的牛奶盒的话，她一定会很开心的。”最后一定要扬他。然后，莎拉，艾利克斯会很快的找到帮助他人的方法--这些都是在他们不知情的情况下就能帮助他们养成的好习惯。

　　3.Mean Words are Unacceptable, Period

　　任何时候都不允许他说刻薄的话

　　Kids tend to say some pretty bad things when they’re feeling insecure or trying to control the situation. On the playground,I’ve heard, “If you don’t do (blank)， I won’t be your friend!” or“I don’t like you, I like Chloe now. She’s my new best friend!”This behavior has to be shut down immediately. Many adults believe these tactics are typical child behavior. But those mean little kids turn into middle-school bullies who become mean adults. Stopit young。

　　当小孩子觉得没有安全感的时候，或者他想掌控全局的时候，他可能会说一些很不好的话。在操场上，我曾听见过，“要是你不做，我们就不是朋友了。”或者“我不喜欢你了，我现在喜欢的是克洛伊，她才是我最好的朋友。”这些行为得马上制止，很多家长[微博]都认为这是孩子很典型的行为。但是这些刻薄的小孩子，长大之后就会变成那种会欺负别人的人。所以要在孩子还小的时候就给纠正过来。

　　4.Speak Up For Themselves

　　让他们表达出自己

　　This skill may be difficult for most kids new to the school environment, particularly if they are introverted. However, it is imperative to teach your child to verbally tell other students tocease harassing behavior. You’re not always going to be at school to protect your kid when things go down, but if your child tells you of a classmate who plays rough, teach them to say, “Stop pushing my that way. I don’t like it。”

　　这一点可能对大多数刚到学校的孩子来说会很困难，而那种比较内向的就更甚。但是，必须要教会你的孩子能够口头阻止别人的骚扰行为，要教会他们说，“不要那样推我，我不喜欢那样。”

　　5.Speak Up for Others

　　能够为别人说话

　　This is controversial because families often teach their children to stay out of situations that don’t involve them. I whole heartedly disagree. Edmund Burke once said, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing。”Obviously, Kindergartners are not evil! Well, most anyway–I kid.However, the sentiment remains the same: when you see someone hurting someone, you step in! Teach your children to be the protector of the little guy。

　　这一点是有些分歧的，因为很多家长都教孩子要学会置身事外，不要把自己也卷进去。我是满心的不赞成这点的。埃德蒙伯克曾说过，“邪能胜正的唯一情况就是，好人的不作为。”很显然，幼儿园教师不是恶魔。但是，不管怎么样，我是这样教育我的孩子的。不管怎么样，心情是一样的：当你看见一个人在打另一个人的时候，你一定会上前阻止的。让你的孩子学着保护他人吧。

本文选自五月的天兰兰的的博客，点击查看原文。