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四级倒计时:名师帮你改作文范文欣赏

http://www.sina.com.cn   2008年12月03日 16:49   新东方
四级倒计时:名师帮你改作文范文欣赏
李艳华

    点评名师:

  李艳华:新东方优秀的写作老师之一。博士生在读。言语平实,内容详尽,逻辑清晰,简洁实用,经验丰富,教学成绩显著。

  Dear accommodation officer:

  I’m Lily, a sophomore in our university majoring in French. I’m writing to you because I want to ask your help (删)for changing for a new single room in next semester.

  As for the reasons why I’d like to change my room, there’re the following points. Now I share the room with another girl. I find that living with someone else is not as pleasant as it seemed to me before, for I can’t keep (enjoy)my privacy and do things freely as I’ve (had) hoped for. Moreover, she always has friends visiting, which makes it hard for me to concentrate on my work and even to have a good rest. Last but not the least, as I want to receive (pursue) the (post)graduate education after graduation, I should prepare for the examination with a great deal of concentration from now on.

  So I’d like to live in a single room next year. I appreciate it very much if you would help me.

  Best

  Wishes

  Yours sincerely

  Lily

  句子结构不错,内容也尚可,逻辑分明。

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